are you my friend?您是我的朋友吗?

The last GLC

2005-12-22T06:36:00.000+09:00

The conclusion of "GLC" is tonite(12/22) from 10pm-12am(HK time). Everyone is invited. So come join the party! By the way, this will be my last post for this year, if I don't get to chat with you tonite..."Have yourself a Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year!"

Email/IM
humblewarrior@gmail.com
onehumblewarrior@yahoo.com

*I'll be giving out Christmas "gifts" at tonite's GLC. Drop by if you want one. (Attention dog lovers, you won't want to miss this!!!)

Going to work

2005-12-21T06:45:00.000+09:00

And you are complaining about taking the sardine-packed bus to work?

a) I am a whiner.
b) I don't know how to ride a bicycle.
c) He's got strong arms and legs, but I don't.
d) He is a dedicated and responsible worker. Hence he'll risk everything to show up at work.
e) I have not seen something like that before.

"My favorite student"

2005-12-20T07:24:00.000+09:00

School Daze
It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.

The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Some flowers." "

That's right" the boy said, "but how did you know?"

"Oh, just a wild guess," she said.

The next pupil was the candy shop owner's daughter.

The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets."

"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl.

"Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.

The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger and touched it to her tongue.

"Is it wine?" she asked.

"No," the boy replied, with some excitement.

The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her tongue.

"Is it champagne?" she asked.

"No," the boy replied, with more excitement.

The teacher took one more taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?"

With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"

Source: Basic Jokes

Final GLC

2005-12-18T03:51:00.000+09:00

It's the final episode of GLC! Come one come all join me this Thursday, December 22nd 05, at 10pm - 12am(HK Time) for a special 2-hour chat session. Let's talk about our thriumps and regrets of 2005, and what 2006 holds. Should be fun. I promise you that I will be as entertaining or if you just need me to listen, I'll be here to listen. I look forward to chatting with you.

Wanna know more about GLC, click "here".

GLC 3

2005-12-16T07:16:00.000+09:00

GLC 3, the second last session of a 4-part Global Live Chat is tonite(12/16) at 11pm-12am. I'll have live open discussion with anyone and basically talk about anything :)

Remember, during this session anyone can either send/IM me private messages(I promise I won't sell your info to the public, hahah)or join the instant messaging group(3 users or more) which I'll create. It's going to be fun. So hope to see you there!

IM/Email
humblewarrior@gmail.com OR onehumblewarrior@yahoo.com

What the heck is "GLC"?

Holding the Fort

2005-12-15T06:33:00.000+09:00

Are you that different at your work place or among your buddies? Will it really benefit you or harm you for being who you are?

The Festive Hairstyle

2005-12-14T07:56:00.000+09:00

Gosh...I am speechless!!!

A south Wales bus driver has spruced himself up for Christmas by having a mini fir tree woven into his hair.

Thirty-one-year-old Mark Davis, from Pontypool, has even hung fairy lights from his head. Good-humoured managers have allowed him to carry on driving his double-decker bus while sporting the eye-catching artificial tree.

The father-of-two said: "I've had a few wacky hairdos before, but this one is head and shoulders above the rest."

"It gives everyone a lift - especially if they get on my bus on their way to do their Christmas shopping."

The bus driver spent two-and-a-half hours in a local hair salon having his hair dyed red and having a holly design shaved into it. Then the mini Christmas tree was delicately woven into his hair before the lights were added.

The festive hairstyle is the latest in a long line of unusual hair cuts for Mark. In the past he sported a dartboard design, a Playboy bunny, and Welsh dragon. 'Go overboard' He added: "It gives everyone a laugh and kids love it. "I wanted to go overboard this year and it's great fun. "The attitude of people to it is amazing."

But Mark added that having a Christmas tree permanently perched on top of his head presented some problems. He said: "It's very difficult to sleep with it. "I have to sleep at the end of the bed so it doesn't get stuck to the headboard."

Source:BBC

Grrrrr...

2005-12-13T07:41:00.000+09:00

I find the following things to be very annoying...

ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE

Leave your indicator on forever

Some knucklehead sing along at the opera

Never make eye contact during conversation

GLC 2

2005-12-09T07:48:00.000+09:00

It is time for GLC 2.

Date:12/9/05
Time:11pm
Location: At your computer/blackberry
*refer to the digital clock on sidebar

If you wanna know more about GLC, please click "here". Oh yeah, "picking your nose" in front of your computer is absolutely fine by me. Don't ever let that stop you from joining this event :)

Pick me, Pick me not

2005-12-07T07:00:00.000+09:00

Posted below is a list that was sent to me earlier by one of my friends(doctor-wannabe's). This list, filled with nose-related-terms, will definately give you a better understanding on some of the medical terms used on TV hits like House, M.D. and Grey's Anatomy.

Nose Picking Glossary
THE KIDDIE PICK: When you'r by yourself and uninhibently twist your forefinger into your nostril with childlike joy and freedom. And the best part is there is no limit.

CAMOUFLAGED KIDDIE PICK: When in the presence of other people, you wrap forefinger in a tissue, then thrust it in deep and hold back the smile.

FAKE NOSE SCRATCH: When you make believe you've got an itch but you'r really trolling the nostril edge for stray boogers.

MAKING A MEAL OUT OF IT: You do it so furiously, and for so long your probably entitled to dessert.

SURPRISE PICKINGS: When a sneeze or laugh causes snot to come hurtling out of your nose and you have to gracefully clean it off your shirt.
AUTOPICK: The kind you do in a car when no one's looking.

PICK AND SAVE: When you have to pick it quickly, just when someone looks away, and than you pocket the snot so they don't catch on to what you did.

PICK AND ROLL: No explanation needed.

PICK AND FLICK: Ditto.

PICK AND STICK: You wanted it to be a "PICK AND FLICK" but it stubbornly clings to your fingertip.

PAYDIRT: The kind when you remove a piece of snot so big it improves your breathing by 90%.
Source: www.pickandsend.com/jh/lists/10.htm

Boiling or Frying?

2005-12-06T07:03:00.000+09:00

I purchased a packet of Rice Stick and some canned food at a local Asian grocery store over the weekend. Brought everything home and all ready to make a nice meal. Being a bad cook coupled with a lack of knowledge in preparing Rice Stick, I flipped the packet over and refered to the instructions. Molly schmolly, those directions are
pretty darn hilarious! What?..."the drip" and "accessories"?

Come join the fun!

2005-12-02T07:05:00.000+09:00

Global Live Chat(GLC) is on at 11pm tonite(12/2). Anyone who is interested can email/IM me at humblewarrior@gmail.com or onehumblewarrior@yahoo.com .

FAQ
What is GLC?
One solid hour of live chat(instant messaging or email) with me and other bloggers. I can't tell you exactly how many people will show up, but I can guarantee you that I'll be there.

Can I join?
This event is absolutely open to everyone.

What to bring?
Bring whatever you want (jokes, tears, advice, complains,comments, stories, questions, problems etc.)

What do I need?
Google Talk or Yahoo Messenger ID

So come join the fun and see you all later!

GLC Countdown

no pain no gain?

2005-12-01T07:13:00.000+09:00

You are heading to the post office to buy some stamps and drop off some letters/packages.

After half an hour inside that place, you're finally done. As you are walking back to your car, you notice something flapping on the ground. So out of curiousity, you go closer to check it out and you see this

First thing that comes to your mind is
a) Yippee, today is my lucky day. More for me.
or
b) The $ ain't mine. Just leave it!
or
c) It's a setup by one of those reality shows. Not gonna fall for it.
or
d) Inform the post office management about this $.
or
e) If I keep it, I'll somehow eventually lose that same amount of $.
or
f) Use the $ to buy 2 Tall Starbucks Coffee Frappuccino for friends. Money for a good cause, so I am clean!!!

GLC is on...

2005-11-30T07:00:00.000+09:00

Ok, I've got a lot of tiny bones to pick today. Kinda behind schedule on maaaannnyyy things(including reading my favorite blogs)after the long weekend. Hopefully things will get better by tomorrow.

Anyway, after much thoughtful consideration, I've decided to begin the 1st of a 4-part(even better than Lord of the Rings trilogy haha minus the dough) Global Live Chat sessions on 12/2. Since we'll be wrapping this year up in about 32 days, I want to take some time "off" to "meet" up with worldwide fellow bloggers before the famous Times Square New Year's Eve ball drops :P . So mark your calender and hope to see everyone on 12/2.

Countdown to GLC... for more info, please refer to sidebar

Turkey day weekend

2005-11-29T07:47:00.000+09:00

Hey, I am baccccck! Thank you all for stopping by my blog and leaving encouraging comments.

Well, Thanksgiving day came and flew past. Had plenty of turkey (some still in my stomach due to leftovers), wide variety of foods(out of my system ummm... I believe 24 hours ago :P ) , and fun over the past 4 days. And, the weather was just absolutely wonderful, in the 80's (24-27C). Some people thought that it was a little too warm for late November but not me. It was just perfect weather for driving from one place to another to visit friends. Oh yes, I also went running after the ball with a bunch of football fanatics for about an hour and 45 mins and that was yesterday.

As I'm typing this post, I am bundled up to 3 layers. I kid you not! It has been a cold day and it's going to be even colder tonight(down to -2C). Can't do nothing except to brave the brutal cold *sigh*. I guess I'm going out to collect some firewood once I am done here.

One last thing, back by popular demand(hahaha), I am considering doing a few more sessions of "Global Live Chat"(probably once per week Asia night time) all the way to Christmas. I promise I'll plan it better this time :)

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year
With the kids jingle belling
And everyone telling you "Be of good cheer"
It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year
It's the hap -happiest season of all
With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings
When friends come to call
It's the hap - happiest season of all ...

Global live chat

2005-11-24T08:39:00.000+09:00

Allright, tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day. Starting from tomorrow all the way to Sunday, it's just going to be lots of food and fun =) . So I won't be blogging for a couple of days.

On the Eve of Thanksgiving, I have decided to do something different. On Nov 23rd 05 from 10:30pm - 12:00am strictly according to the digital clock on the sidebar(pls scroll down to see the clock), I'll do a 90-minute Thanksgiving special of live chat(even emails will be replied instantly) with fellow bloggers. Anything you want to discuss/share/complain etc, just bring them on. And by the way, I don't plan to sell you anything and there's absolutely no catch or whatsoever. Please no worries! Here are the details:

Email or Instant Messenger: humblewarrior@gmail.com

Have a happy Thanksgiving and I'll talk to you later!

My equation

2005-11-24T00:29:00.000+09:00

My sin x

A worker's life can sometimes be that simple and straightforward. Just be ready to handle what's coming his/her way.

Memory loss vs. Being pretentious

2005-11-23T00:24:00.000+09:00

A table for:3 (me, and the couple)
New friend: J's newfound lover
Time: 2 Saturdays ago
Location: Authentic Mexican food restaurant
Meal: Lunch
Duration: An hour and a half
Activities:
1)Ate tortillas with salsa, beef & chicken fajitas and enchiladas.
2)3 of us discussed about life, work and office politics.

fastforward to...11/20
Time: Around 2pm
Location: A publicly traded electronics retailer
Section: Cameras & Camcorders
What happened : I saw him(J's newfound lover) checking out one of those digital cameras. He was alone. So I went over to say hello. Couldn't believe it. He had totally forgotten about me. His facial expression and body language showed as if he was going to be mugged or something.

Question:
Bad Short/longterm memory or he was trying to say"I was just putting up a good show 2 Saturdays ago, now leave me alone"????

My nickname is...

2005-11-19T00:33:00.000+09:00

I suspect we all have real(given) names and nicknames(nasty and pleasant ones), seriously! I have heard people say "My name is Samatha, but please call me Sam!" or " I'm Raymond, but I go by Ray."

So what is a nickname? A nickname is usually a short substitute name for a person's real name. Often if a nickname is mentioned, you can pretty much guess the real name. Here are some examples:
Nicknames Given Names
Cindy ===== Cynthia
Jim ====== James
Tina ====== Christina
Frankie ==== Francis
Rob ====== Robert
...

For some people nicknames are usually "cool" to have and sweet to the ears, but others just hate them. Well, I have no problem with nicknames. It's just that sometimes there are way too many nicknames to one given name. There are even nicknames out there that don't make any sense to me.

You see, how did "Dick" become a nickname for "Richard"? How in the world did "Daisy" become a nickname for "Margaret"? And if your name is Catherine, why do you want people to call you Cathy, Karen, Katie, Kathleen, Kay, Kit, Kati, Kate, or Kitty?

Huh? Actor Dick Dreyfuss? Former prime minister Daisy Thatcher ? The Legend of Zorro star Kitty Zeta-Jones?

All things are possible

2005-11-18T00:42:00.000+09:00

In my opinion, the word "negotiation" is a BIG word. Many times it goes beyond what you can imagine. It's about one willing to offer and the other willing to accept. And most people often view it as a win-win-situation. "This story" will prove to you that it's possible to achieve and get what you wish if you believe in negotiation.

So do remember this story next time if you need say...lifetime supply of Colgate toothpaste, Tropicana orange juice, Ralph Lauren T-Shirt or even Purina Dog & Cat food...etc.

By the way, if you wish for an unlimited cash cow, sorry to burst your bubble that you still have to work hard and smart. =)

My Taiwanese connection?

2005-11-17T00:19:00.000+09:00

1998
Did my summer internship as a tourism sales associate/translator with a German company in Titisee, Germany. I was treated as if a star when Taiwanese tour groups on daily basis requested to take pictures with me.

1999-2005
Countless direct or indirect comments from my Taiwanese friends about my looks and how I would make it big if I were to live in Taiwan.

Yesterday, 2005
Heard another compliment from one acquaintance about the same subject.

Just exactly what could I do in Taiwan?

Pardon, madame

2005-11-16T00:32:00.000+09:00

I accidentally "witnessed" the following incident over the weekend when I was out shopping for a dark green wool sweater. You can call me whatever names you want, I just didn't do anything about it because

a) she was a stranger(so don't know how she would react to the news and she would probably think that I am a pervert or something)
AND
b) i didn't want to embarrass her (sometimes some occurrences in life are better left untold. Let her discover it later...say when she is home :P)

Just exactly what am I talking about? Here it goes...
Imagine you are shopping in a local mall. As you are busy searching for the things you want, you suddenly notice a stranger's zipper that's wide open. Would you say something?

The Keyboard & Balls

2005-11-13T00:26:00.000+09:00

Something funny for your weekend :B

BALL PLAYER (Funny Videos)

Video Code provided by VideoCodeZone.Com

Resume writing 201

2005-11-12T00:39:00.000+09:00

Writing a resume is not an easy thing to do. Check it out...

Resume Mistakes (Robin Stevens)
How bad a mistake can you make on your resume? Here are some real-life examples:

"My intensity and focus are at inordinately high levels, and my ability to complete projects on time is unspeakable."

"Education: Curses in liberal arts, curses in computer science, curses in accounting."

"Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store."

"Personal: Married, 1992 Chevrolet."

"I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse."

"I am a rabid typist."

"Created a new market for pigs by processing, advertising and selling a gourmet pig mail order service on the side."

"Exposure to German for two years, but many words are not appropriate for business."

"Proven ability to trak down and correct erors."

"Personal interests: Donating blood. 15 gallons so far."

"I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely nothing and absolutely no one."

"References: None, I've left a path of destruction behind me."

"Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer."

"Don't take the comments of my former employer too seriously, they were unappreciative beggars and slave drivers."

"My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I possess no training in meteroology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."

"I procrastinate - especially when the task is unpleasant."

"I am loyal to my employer at all costs ... Please feel free to resond to my resume on my office voicemanil."

"Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets."

"Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department."

"Extensive background in accounting. I can also stand on my head!"

Cover letter: "Thank you for your consideration. Hope to hear from you shorty!"

More chic than sheep, really?

2005-11-11T00:48:00.000+09:00

Many people are aware of the dangers of global warming. We often hear terms like climate change, greenhouse effect, pollution, rising oceans and carbon dioxide being used whenever scientists and researchers discuss about this issue.

Relax, I am not writing to ask for donations for saving some people/animals. Nor am I here to criticize anyone. You see, I actually came across this short report about global warming on BBC during lunch break and thought of sharing with you now. This is a very serious report and I strongly encourage you to read it. You'll soon find out how "some" of you can save the world. :-)))

"Please tell me what I can do to help!"?
.
..
...
....
.....
GUYS, we have got to put on our thinking cap and see how we can contribute too !!!

you're on your own?

2005-11-10T00:06:00.000+09:00

As I opened the glass door with steel frame about to enter a fine restaurant, I noticed there were 2 extremely well dressed middle aged women right behind me. Being a mature gentleman(ya-di-ya-di-yada...), I held the door open for them.

Seconds later they entered and walked past me without acknowledging the kindness which I just showed them. No eye contact, no "Thank you" and no nothing. And I was like...

What's up with that? Was I expecting too much???

My homework

2005-11-09T03:17:00.000+09:00

Well well well, I was tagged by the hardworking Dreamer on the day before Halloween. I actually wanted to write the whole thing up over the past weekend but just didn't have the time. So in order to drop the guilt, I have finally decided to put aside all the important things and write it now. Here are my real AND illusory answers. :P

Seven things I plan to do before I die...
* Find the rest of my 6 lookalikes
* See that my blog goes IPO
* Experience futuristic teletransporting ala Star-Trek
* Make sure that humblewarrior becomes a legend blogger
* Climb Mount Everest
* Walk in the REAL winter wonderland
* Perform open surgery on the knee

Seven things that I can do...
* Channel-flipping (flipping 30 channels in 10 seconds)
* Skydiving without opening the chute
* Outrun Thumper the Rabbit
* Sleep with one eye wide open (spooooooky)
* Drive around town ignoring all traffic rules
* Move both my ears with my mind
* No bathing for a full week

Seven celebrity crushes
None

Seven current/recent books
* Made in America - Sam Walton
* Fast Food Nation - Eric Schlosser
* The Purpose Driven Life - Rick Warren
* One Billion Customers : Lessons from the Front Lines of Doing Business in China - James McGregor
* The Dollar Crisis - Richard Duncan
* When God is Silent - Charles Swindoll
* Newsweek - Nov 7

Seven favourite foods
* Korean bulgogi
* German gulasch
* Chinese food (buffet style)
* Tiramisu cheesecake
* Liquor filled chocolates =)
* Celery with peanut butter
* Anything with cinnamon on it

Seven random facts about me
* My nickname is Dude!
* I've got six toes on one side of my foot.(hahaha, not giving it away)
* I once appeared as a guest on Jerry Springer Show.
* Was a 2nd lieutenant with the Air Force for a very short period of time
* Years ago persuaded a cat named Oscar to come down from the tree
* I see things perfectly without my glasses
* I am getting older everyday

Seven poeple I want to tag
Who wants to be tagged? Any takers?

A good worker

2005-11-06T00:47:00.000+09:00

Don't ever let this happen to you ok. Have a fun weekend!

Job Review(Richard Walters)
One day, a project leader was asked to submit a review of one of his employees. He wrote the following:

"Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found

hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without

wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never

thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always

finishes given assignments on time. Often, Bob takes extended

measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee

breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no

vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound

knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be

classed as a high-caliber employee, the type which cannot be

dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be

promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be

executed as soon as possible."

Regards - Project Leader

Shortly thereafter, the HR department received the following memo from the project leader:

"Sorry, but that idiot was reading over my shoulder while I
wrote the report sent to you earlier today. Kindly read only
the odd numbered lines for my true assessment of him."

Regards - Project Leader

Total Fat 7g

2005-11-05T00:46:00.000+09:00

The yellow Casio G-shock on your wrist shows 1:32pm. You still have not had lunch. Just wanna grab a quick bite before heading back to your office by 2:05. You spot a fast food chain 1 block away and walk straight towards it. Look around and you notice that the happy place is packed with school kids and office workers. Minutes later is your turn to place an order.

Cashier: Sir, how can I help you?
You: Yes, I would like to have a Meal #2 please.
Cashier: Do you want cheese on it?
You: Yes, and can you please super size it please.
Cashier: Alrightt! Anything else?
You: Nope
Cashier: For here or to go?
You: To go.
Cashier: Ok. Your total is $4.86

So you walk out with a huge burger, a bag of supersize fries and a drink thinking that you've just paid less than 5 bucks for lunch. Sitting under a tree, you open up the bag and swallow the whole meal in about 15 mins. Look at your wrist watch again, it's about time to get back to your office.

Here are my questions to you:
Do you care about the nutritional facts of fast food? Will consumers(children or adults) eat less because of those facts? Do you know that McDonald's will soon be printing nutritional facts?

PS: I have nothing against Mickey D =)

not in the eye of the beholder...

2005-11-04T00:41:00.000+09:00

Do people repeatedly peek or stare at you when you are out at the mall, school, work etc? And often you just know that there's nothing wrong with you. You walk like a fine gentleman/lady, dress appropriately, hair is nicely done, not shouting on your cellphone, and of course you have got no BO that can be detected miles away. You think and think and think why... why do people stare at you?

Forget about asking your psychic friends or seeking professional medical help. Turn to newborn babies. Yes, they'll be able to "help" and here's how and why .

So, if babies prefer your face over someone else's, good for you. If they look at you and start crying, tough luck =)

putting up signs

2005-11-03T00:39:00.000+09:00

We should be very careful when it comes to writing our thoughts on paper. See for yourself...

Badly Worded Signs (Erion Cano)

Outside a jeweller's shop:
Ears pierced while you wait

Outside an electrical store:
Why go elsewhere to be cheated when you can come in here!

Sign in a laundromat:
Automatic washing machines: please remove all your clothes when the light goes out

In a dress shop window:
Don't stand outside and faint - come in and have a fit

Sign in a London department store:
Bargain basement upstairs

In an office:
Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken

Outside a farm:
Horse manure: 50p per pre-packed bag, 20p do-it-yourself

In the window of a dry cleaner's:
Same day dry cleaning - all garments ready in 48 hours

At the zoo:
Please do not feed the elephants. If you have any peanuts or buns give them to the keeper on duty

In an office:
After teabreak staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board

Outside a furniture shop:
Our motto: We promise you the lowest prices and workmanship

Outside a photographer's studio:
Out to lunch: if not back by five, out for dinner also

Sign on a farm gate:
Dogs found worrying will be shot

In a restaurant:
Customers who find our waiting staff rude should see the manager

Outside a smart shop:
No children aloud

Seen outside a travel agency:
Why don't you go away?

Sign in a picture shop:
Let us put you in the picture and frame you

In an electrical shop:
Why smash your plates washing up? Let one of our dishwashers do it for you

In a cafe window:
Waitresses required for breakfast

Seen in a shop selling calculators and computers:
You can always count on us

Seen at an American undertaker's:
Oscar's Funeral Parlour - where you'll always find a smile

Notice in a London park:
No walking, sitting or playing on the grass in this pleasure park

Sign warning of quicksand:
Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council

Sign on a newly painted bench:
Wet paint. Watch it or wear it

Sign outside pet shop:
No dogs allowed

Sign on motorway garage:
Please do not smoke near our petrol pumps. Your life may not be worth much but our petrol is

Spotted in a toilet in a London office block:
Toilet out of order. Please use floor below

how so?

2005-11-02T00:34:00.000+09:00

Last weekend was alright. Just couldn't believe that the weather was so pleasant(high in the low 80s). Did the usual stuff and also met with friends. Also experienced some "incidents" if you will and wanted to sum them up.

1. Cars in the next lane do not go faster. So, stay in mine own lane.
2. Traffic lights are always red when I'm in hurry.
3. When I don't need something, that something is always around. But
when I need it, it is nowhere to be found.

As always, 1st day of the month is time to do a little advertising... So if you see this dude please let me know =) .

The verdict is in.

2005-10-28T23:38:00.000+09:00

Is having a job similar to doing time in a minimum security prison? To many of you who just looooooveeeee working, here's something for you!

Prison versus Work (By KJ Fowler)
In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell.
At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.

In prison you get three meals a day.
At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.

In prison you get time off for good behavior.
At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.

In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.

In prison you can watch TV and play games.
At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere.
At work you are just ball-and-chained.

In prison you get your own loo.
At work you have to share.

In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required.
At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.

In prison there are wardens who are often sadistic.
At work we have managers.

didn't see that coming

2005-10-27T23:06:00.000+09:00

A pair of Puma Vencida i FG blue soccer cleats - $49.99

A pair of Nike Classic green socks(yes that's right, dark green) - $6.95

Inadvertently scoring a goal for my opponents due to my carelessness - PRICELESS

There are some moments money can't buy, for everything else there's FORGIVNESS

a better way to say...

2005-10-27T02:57:00.000+09:00

My old pal forwarded this joke to me. In my opinion it is extremely relevant to today's working world. Whether you're the boss or employee, working hard for a tiny or giant company, perhaps the memo below serves as a good reminder to you when it comes to communicating with colleagues. Oh... by the way, please excuse the use of vulgarity in the joke.

Memorandum
TO: All employees
FROM: The BIG BIG BIG boss
DATE: May 17, 2005
RE: Foul Language It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their coworkers. Due to complaints received from some employees who are easily offended, this type of language will be no longer tolerated. We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with coworkers. Therefore, a list of new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive employees.

TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?

TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my @%$.

TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at this moment.
INSTEAD OF: Damn it, I'm on salary.

TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your @%$

TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This job sucks.

TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the hell died and made you boss?

TRY SAYING: I see.
INSTEAD OF: Bite me.

TRY SAYING: Yes, we really should discuss it.
INSTEAD OF: Another @%$king meeting?

TRY SAYING: I don't think this will be a problem.
INSTEAD OF: I really don't give a damn.

TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a @%$king prick. .

TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: What the hell are you doing?

Talk ain't cheap

2005-10-25T20:26:00.000+09:00

If you think talk is cheap, think again! I read this very short article this morning and thought of sharing with you now. Check it out at TrumpTalk .

Now, hiring an attorney is a different story since you pay him/her to fight the case for you(which includes studying the case thoroughly, preparing the necessary paperwork AND speaking on your behalf etc). But for Mr.Trump, he was paid $416.66 per sec just to speak to a group of his fans.

So this is what I have in mind. Next time if you are emotionally and financially unstable(for whatever reasons) and you seek some "advice", please drop by and I'll talk to you without charging you a single cent.

By the way, I guarantee that our conversations are kept private, hahaha!

people please!!!

2005-10-22T20:49:00.000+09:00

Some people just don't listen, I guess! No no no, they have got ears that work fine, but it's just that they only want to hear what they think is right or make sense to them.

It's like telling them that 5lbs of gold is NOT heavier than 5lbs of cotton. There are some things in life that are very obvious and straight forward. Come on, I don't mine gold.

ASAP ii

2005-10-21T20:39:00.000+09:00

I have the following message written up with lots of shorthand. If you can precisely decode it, you deserve a real nice meal from me. Trust me! You have my word! <--- "Yeah right, I have heard this before", hahaha...

Message on a voice machine:

Hey it's me, Joey! WTH, WWY? I waited 4 u @ the coffee house 4 45mins. DYNCAM? Were you JTB or you purposely SMU? U should have at least called me.FTTB, I will give u TBOD. So as soon as you get this message, EOPM. JSYK that I was so worried 4 u that I PIMP. HHVF
:( . TTFN.

PS: No vulgar words...

ASAP

2005-10-20T20:23:00.000+09:00

So we always want to save time and get things done not fast but faster. Many of us complain that we have no time for this and that, even when it comes to writing. We basically just want to relay messages to others by using the least words as possible.

One very obvious trend which I notice is how people love to use chat shorthand or message board abbreviation. Some examples are:
lol = laugh out loud
btw = by the way
gl= good luck
hago = have a good one
iat = i am tired
imho = in my humble opinion
wysiwyg = what you see is what you get

I have been thinking ...what if I come up with my own shorthand and popularize them. Posibble? I have randomly picked these alphabets. Can I make these into shorthands of phrases that we use in daily conversation?
orn
yhsol
cyg
yoy
rc

appreciation vs. honesty

2005-10-19T20:19:00.000+09:00

I was out at the grocery store late evening. In about 25 mins I filled up the shopping basket with milk, bread ,eggs, fruits, veggie, meat and can foods. Of course, without further prolonging my stay at that jam-packed store, I immediately went to the checkout counter with the shortest line.

After finished paying the cashier, the grocery bagger handed me all my groceries. I walked to my blue VW and loaded all the plastic bags into the trunk. As I was putting down the last bag, I realized that the bag had 4 loaves bread in there. Knowing that I bought only 1 loave, I quickly checked my receipt to see whether they charged me for those breads.

Later on it was pretty clear that the bagger had accidently "rewarded" me with 3 extra loaves of bread. So being a honest guy(who?me?), I walked all the way back and returned those extras.

Me: Excuse me mam! I didn't buy these.
Bagger: Oh yeah? These are NOT yours?
Me: Nope.
Bagger: Ok. <--- End of conversation

Now, I'm not blogging about this so that I'll be awarded a medal for what I did. Let me get this right, wouldn't it be more polite for her to end the conversation with a sentence like "Thank you for...." then just "Ok." How come some people just can't show some appreciation? Or I shouldn't have expected a nice gesture in the first place since I didn't pay for those breads.

you out of your mind?

2005-10-18T20:27:00.000+09:00

Most of my XYand XX friends always debate with me over some interesting topics. This particular million-dollar topic actually came up over the weekend.

Since we all didn't come to an agreement(not sure if there'll be any) on this topic, I decided to bring this up to an independent and non-biased audience, that's you!

Remember, the following questions apply to everyone(single, dating, married). So here you go...

Do you think it's possible to have a GOOD BUDDY of the opposite sex? Why yes and why no?

keep an eye on the clock

2005-10-14T20:42:00.000+09:00

32 mins ago I was 6th in line at the drive-thru pharmacy. And now I'm at 3rd spot. What's going on man? Still waiting for my turn to get to the pickup window so that I can get my prescription.

Don't really know how much longer will it be before I see the pharmacist. Oh boy, should I leave and come back later? Am I that impatient?

Arrrgghhh just how long is too long?

just not a good time!

2005-10-13T20:13:00.000+09:00

Let's be honest. I hear people say em' to me and and I say em' to people sometimes or most of the time...

The most common excuses that you could come up with to instantly end a conversation with a friend OR stranger over the phone are:

a) I gotta go. My boss is coming to my cubible. - not even at your office
b) I can't talk now. Will definately call you back. - no intention to
c) Hey man! Nature's call. I need to go to the bathroom. - bladder or
colon not even a quarter full
d) I am very busy. Can you call me later? - will never pick up the phone
later
e) You'll see me there if I plan to show up. - WHAT???

You know, the funny thing is often people will still "believe" us again and again although they have heard those excuses before.

Hey if you have better ones, do share with me.

I didn't do it, he did!

2005-10-12T19:49:00.000+09:00

Aren't we all sometimes guilty of telling lies? We basically lie to either ourselves or to others. Lies require a lot of cognitive effort and energy. It is not an easy thing to do(note: I am NOT encouraging it) I should say. Why? You see, a liar always has to come out with ways or stories to cover up the truth by keeping silent or twisting and turning the truth. Some even go further than that...

Now how about the so called white lies and black lies? Any REAL differences between those two? Should we for whatever reason accept one and deny the other?

To me, a lie is always a lie!

Help me , help you?

2005-10-11T19:41:00.000+09:00

I was out running errants yesterday afternoon. Cruising and enjoying some music in my car along this fine boulevard, I managed to pass 3 traffic lights before the 4th light turned red on me. Naturally being a responsible and careful driver, I stopped at the light and there I was 3rd in line.

I saw that there was this homeless man probably in his early forties holding a half-torn-up cardboard that says "Aren't you glad it's me & not you? Please help!" With his cardboard placed in front of this body, he walked back and forth along the road hoping that some drivers would offer him something.

This is a very common scene here in the city where I live. It doesn't matter whether it's 100F degrees or 40F degree, you'll see them out there. So,
When do we help and when not to help? (Not that there's anything wrong with helping...)

No standing please!

2005-10-08T20:31:00.000+09:00

Restroom sign

The reason I put this photo up is to share a good laugh with fellow bloggers. It is absolutely NOT intended to humiliate or offend anyone regardless of nationality and gender. Please hold your spamming...

I wonder has anyone thought of marketing such stickers for household use?

a needle in a haystack

2005-10-07T19:39:00.000+09:00

It has already been 2 weeks now since I first posted "Wanted - My 6 lookalikes" . Till today I still have not received any positive leads from those who left me comments, but hey I deeply appreciate your kindness and efforts by leaving me your precious 2 cents .

Don't really know how much longer will I try before I call off this search(don't wanna bore you all and waste fellow blogger's money and time , yeah right ...) . Since we currently have 6.4 billion individuals on this earth, I have decided to give it a little more time and patient. One crazy dude, I am indeed!

Coal carrier

2005-10-06T19:53:00.000+09:00

Coal Carrier

Wang Zhizhong worked as a coal carrier. Carrying a basket of coal weighing 40kg (88 lb), he made his way up a 100m deep mine, and then walked a distance of 1000m along a mountainous track. For each trip, he made 1RMB (0.123 USD). He was 17.
Source: Unknown

Are you complaining about having too much work at the office, long hours , not paid enough blah blah blah? Think broader and you'll start counting your blessings. Learn something special here and not take things in our lives for granted. And yes, you can see that your 2 cents worth a lot to Mr. Wang.

my R foot & R hand

2005-10-05T19:48:00.000+09:00

Allright , humans can't do everything sometimes even simple stuff. Is this a fair statement? Well read the following and see what you can do(only for people who are sober please...). I tried it many times and just couldn't get it right. I wonder whether this has something to do men or women, you know the theory of how male and female brains are wired differently etc or there's actually someone out there who can do it right. Try it out and let me know!

Source: Not mine!!!!
How Smart is Your Right Foot?

This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And you will keep trying at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot, but you can't.

1)While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.

Your foot will change direction. I told you so .....And there's nothing you can do about it .
Make sure you pass this on to your friends...they won't be able to believe it either!!

what's in this picture?

2005-10-04T19:46:00.000+09:00

A cloudy day

It is so quiet here. I don't hear any birds chirping neither do I see trees waving back and forth. This is what we often need especially living in a busy and hectic world ... A time of solitude!

Quote for you

2005-10-02T17:05:00.000+09:00

Do not complain if you have got nothing to offer. Duh! Stop whining ...

by the way I'm still searching...

2005-10-01T17:20:00.000+09:00

Apparently I have been told by people from different continents that there are 7 people that look a like in this world. Well, guess what...I have decided to find the other 6 that looks like me! Have you seen any of them or are you one of them?

明显地有人从不同的国家告诉我说, 这个世界里有 7 个人看起来是一样的。因此我决定寻找其余的6六个长的象我的人! 您是否看见了任何一个或您是他们当中一个?

May I offer you a gum?

2005-10-01T17:13:00.000+09:00

Great! The weekend is finally here.Will definately treasure the coming 48 hours and not waste them on something silly and meaningless. Har har har, so I say..

Anyway , I was out with some friends (not best buddies) this evening and boy oh boy, I tell you... one of them had such bad breath that could instantly kill a bunch of elephants. I wanted to offer him a piece of gum but I was afraid I would seriously offend him. So what did I do? I held my breath while he talked! Would you do the same? I tried to control the conversation by talking more.... but still, there were moments he had to intercept and boy did I hold my breath like an olympic swimmer!
Any suggestions for what other things I could have done?

Do you feel used?

2005-09-30T16:05:00.000+09:00

What a tiring day. Still have time to think about this question. Honestly, let me know what you think. But keep it clean please! Here's the question:

How do you know that you have been taken advantage of?

Ring Ring! Who's there?

2005-09-29T12:07:00.000+09:00

So many telemarketers called today. The phone kept ringing. If you were a telemarketer eating dinner at home and the phone rings ( obviously a telemarketing call), would you pick up? Does the theory of how ex waiters/waitress tend to treat waiters/waitress well apply?

would you feel hurt?

2005-09-28T12:54:00.000+09:00

Again, it was another hot day. The temperature was around 103F. Still having a very bad headache due to the weather. Anyhow, I played indoor sport this evening and saw a happening which I thought of sharing with fellow bloggers.

Imagine if you are one of the last 3 guys to participate in an on going 7 aside indoor football game. By the way, they all know each other. Team A has picked 6 players and team B has 5. It seems that you will be the last guy standing and neither team wants to pick you to be on their side. How would you feel ( the last person standing wasn't me by the way!)?

why grass is greener on the other side

2005-09-27T12:09:00.000+09:00

Learned a great lesson today. Funny how great geniuses are hidden around us. I've been searching for this great knowledge far and wide, only to find that this great truth was a stone's throw away. Like the saying goes, the best place to hide something is right where it's obvious. This great genius thought me never to give up, that there is always hope right in the midst of where I am. So if you think that the grass is greener on the other side, it's cause there is more dung!

A whopping 40C!

2005-09-26T12:21:00.000+09:00

so Rita came and gone....was supposed to bring rain but we didn't even get a drop! Hit record high todays... played football in this blasted heat too!

So are lookalikes suppose to meet? I haven't met one that look like me. And what happens if we do? Will we instantly click? If we count blood relatives, well I don't look like my brothers at all. Plus I am a good mix between my dad and mum...so what does that make me?

Emotionalistic! Where's this Vincent? Let' see if we really look alike!

still nothing on day 2

2005-09-24T06:42:00.000+09:00

Howdy! To those who left me comments( + or - ), thanks a bunch! I really appreciate you spending the time to drop me a line or two or three..! I am sure that with your help, I will soon find my "buddies". You know, it's like the movie "Saving Private Ryan"(exclude all gore and gruesome scenes please), it takes a squad to locate one guy. Of course in my case, we are talking about 6 more anywhere on this earth.

Oh yeah, I know my blog looks darnnnn simple. Give me some time and I work on it WHEN I have extra minutes to spare. Other than that I have got nothing else to share or complain about, HINT HINT HINT it's FRIDAY. So do keep me posted if you guys spot anything. Dark clouds are coming, I better get ready.